Parenting in Difficult Times
What kind of legacy are we leaving our children… especially in our nation’s current situation? What we are facing seems to be a difficult, challenging, and very interesting time in our lives right now. How are we reacting, what are we saying, how are we loving, steering, and guiding our children through this time?
God is our refuge and STRENGTH, a very present help in trouble. Psalms 46:1
The most important thing to remember? Stay focused on the information that is TRUE – that being God’s Word. There are so many truths and lessons we can learn from these experiences we are going through… don’t miss them!
In Proverbs 22:6 it says to “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it”
Do we speak truth?
Do we show love no matter what?
Do I point them to Christ?
When my kids look back at this experience, I pray they will remember how we as a family stayed united and sought after God’s truth through it all.
My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth! Psalm 121:2
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4 Things to Do When You Feel Attacked
Let’s face it, life is challenging. Some seasons are worse than others. Approaching the holiday season is no exception.
The Enemy of Our Souls Prefers to Attack Us When We’re Tired
Paul reminds us in Ephesians 6:12
“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”
Spiritual Attacks Come When We Least Expect Them
Not looking? Watch out. Attacks can come our way during moments when we think we’re feeling pretty good or strong. Like a skilled boxer, the enemy is strategic. He uses a quick jab to surprise us, distract us, knock us off balance and mess with our confidence.
Keep in Mind – It’s His Job
Revelation 12:10 “Then I heard a loud voice in heaven, saying, “Now the salvation, and the power, and the kingdom of our God and the authority of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren has been thrown down, he who accuses them before our God day and night.”
Remember, God Has Instilled Himself in You
1 John 4:4 “You are from God, little children, and have overcome them; because greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.”
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Character Over Control And Comfort
Control.
We all want it. We don’t always get it. Sometimes we get it, then decide we don’t want it.
Sigh.
It seems sometimes Christians get this notion of the “abundant life” (found in John 10) fleshing out as the perfect life, being in control of all circumstances, a comfortable existence, all our dreams coming true, instant answers to prayer and 100% happiness.
All. Day. Every. Day.
But here’s the hard truth: life is not easy. It wasn’t meant to be. This is not Heaven.
When we pray with control in mind, we treat God like a vending machine.
He is not a vending machine, a genie in a bottle or a drive through.
He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, Maker of Heaven and Earth. And He wants to see you grow in character, know and trust Him infinitely more than He wants you to feel comfortable.
Consider these wise words…
Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way. -James 1:2-3Take on an entirely new way of life — a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you. -Ephesians 4:22-24Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. – Romans 5: 1-5
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The Issue with Perseverance
All Moses knew was that God called and sent him. He obeyed, told Pharaoh to let his people go, and stood for God.
For a time he’d be the most hated man in all Israel
There would be 10 plagues
His family would be significantly stretched & then separated
His own brother would be involved in rebellion against him & God – twice
The wilderness would present one life ending threat after another
There would be another 40 years of wilderness wandering
After everything he taught them (and they’d been through), very little of it really mattered…they seemed to learn little to nothing
So many people under his leadership would die because of rebellion, hatred of him and hatred toward God
In the end, he wouldn’t even get to enter the Promised Land
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Listen Up!
I have always been told that communication takes two people: one person to send a message- verbal or nonverbal- and one person to receive the message. Of course, message sent doesn’t always mean message received. Good communication requires the message receiver to actually acknowledge the message was received.
In general, our society is filled with people engrossed with pleasing only themselves. When we participate in this behavior, our focus is off of others and solely on ourselves.
Most people in life just want to be heard. I witness it in my job every day. Someone else’s problem may seem small to us, but to them it could be a major crisis or devastatingly life changing.
The Bible tells us in James 1:19:
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry…
Did you notice what James points out first? Be quick to listen. I am so quick to think of what to say next- or have a response prepared- before I’ve even completely processed what someone else is actually saying. That makes it all about me.
Making it about them requires more than merely hearing, but actively listening.
I encourage you- along with myself- to take the time to really listen to others. You never know how you may impact someone’s life just by taking the time required to truly listen to them. The next time you find yourself working to actively listen to someone, remember these three things:
2. Actively listening is an act of love.
3. Actively listening reflects your relationship with Christ.
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4 Things to Remember When You’re On the Edge
I can honestly tell you this: you are not alone. Over the past two years, I have had some major events in my life that have not only tested my emotions and thoughts, but also tested everything I believe in and the will to keep pushing through those events. By the grace of God and a great support system, I have come out of all of those circumstances a much stronger person… or so I thought.
Every now and then, a little something from each of those events creeps back into my life and thoughts. I feel the weight of things that happened in the past all over again. I feel the wounds they have left behind- in my mind and the inner most parts of my being.
It is usually then that I find myself right on the edge of keeping it all together…
I feel like I’m about to have a good old fashion freak-out moment.
1. Normal – The definition of “normal” is up for interpretation. What I have learned is that my feelings and my reactions are absolutely normal. I am not weird for feeling upset or wanting to cry about past traumatic events. Neither are you.
2. Time – they say time heals all wounds. Not really. It may be a nice cliché, but in real life it takes intentional work to heal through the pain. This is what heals the wounds and grows us. If the pain isn’t dealt with and merely buried in “time” (denial), it will one day rip that scab off with the same intensity as it did 30 years ago. Scars will always be there, but I know with the Lord working in me as I do the work of healing and the buffer of time- this allows us to become stronger. One step at a time. One day at a time. It must be a conscious choice we make every day.
3. A Support System – they say that you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family. If you’re not close with your family, you must still have a support system in place. Usually our parents have gone through something in the course of their lives. They can offer advice or just be there to listen. Be wise about this- choose people who are safe, honest and have your best interest at heart.
4. God – they say to just lean on God in the hard times. It’s so easy to say, harder to do. What I have learned is this: God deeply cares for me and feels the overwhelming emotions with me. When I question God on why bad things happen to good people, He doesn’t get mad at me. He tells me that evil things are not His plan- His plan is for our good. His plan is for all of us to live in eternity with him. But there is a darkness in this world and that darkness (our enemy- Satan) is the cause of those bad things happening to good people.
The bottom line?
When I am sometimes on the edge, God can work in my life if I allow him to. God wants what is best for us, and sometimes being on the edge is just where he wants us. No pain is wasted in the hands of our Savior. He desires to grow us through it. He wants us to reach out and grab his hand, so he can pull us into his loving arms.
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